NiGhTmArEs
It was late at night and he just couldn't fall asleep. He didn't want to get up either, so he was laying on his bed, thinking of some important things in his life. His moirail was sleeping next to him, he seemed calm as he murmured something barely audible in his sleep. "At least he is safe now", he thought, however he wasn't exactly sure what was his moirail safe from. Maybe from his own self.
It's been a week since Gamzee didn't go sober and didn't want to kill anyone who stood in his way. One single week may not be a long time for anyone who leads an ordinary life, but it was an incredibly long amount of time for Karkat and it was possibly because of the fear of Gamzee becoming sober again. He was afraid that maybe the next time he won't be able to calm him down. But he wasn't afraid of getting murdered. He knew that if he died he would be a victim of a purpose that serves everyone else's benefits. Except for Gamzee who would probably try to commit suicide again after he went back to his normal self and realized what he did.
Something similar happened once. Gamzee was completely insane and after killing Tavros he wanted to chop off Karkat's head with his own sickle. He even placed a deep cut on his neck. But when he saw Karkat's red blood dripping on his hand, he suddenly became sane again. He broke down crying and Karkat tried to comfort him but he didn't succeed, Gamzee constantly said he didn't deserve to live because of almost killing his only friend, he raised the sickle to his wrist with an intention to cut it. Karkat could hardly stop him. He offered to become moirails and Gamzee agreed. Since then they were sharing Karkat's hive.
However, things just slightly become better. Gamzee had woken up every night and he looked like a psycho; from time to time he tried to choke Karkat in his sleep but luckily he always woke up in time. And even when Gamzee was asleep, he had nightmares and ended up waking with suicidal thoughts. These mentally abnormal cases soon became usual, so that now Karkat was afraid of Gamzee when he looked relatively calm when being either awake or asleep. He knew that insanity could kick in at any given moment and then his life would be at risk. He didn't mind it though, 'cause Gamzee was his best friend after all.
While he was so deep in his thoughts, Karkat occasionally looked at his friend. And by occasionally, he meant every single minute. One moment he was sleeping peacefully but then the next he was laying there with eyes shot open. He seemed like he was just staring into the darkness pointlessly, but his eyes were focused on one certain point. Karkat shivered as he looked at him and Gamzee noticed it.
"What's wrong, best friend?" he asked with a calm tone in his voice and that caused Karkat to look away.
"Nothing at all..." he answered, his voice was trembling. No matter how much he tried to hide his anxiety, he obviously failed. He knew what was going to happen when Gamzee heard the fear in his voice. He knew it made him lose control in a blink of an eye.
He was afraid to face his best friend but he could clearly feel the curious pair of eyes staring at his back; it was a feeling similar to the pain of being stabbed. He knew damn well what it's like to be stabbed, once Gamzee chose that method to try to kill him. Back then he couldn't find Gamzee anywhere and he didn't even notice that he was standing right behind him until he heard a loud "HoNk" sound straight into his ears. While he was trying to gain his balance back because of the sudden fright, he could feel a stabbing pain throughout his whole body. When he looked down on himself, he saw a long blade jutting from his stomach, and the feeling of unbearable pain became even more powerful. Blood was dripping from the tip of the blade and his shirt was also soaked in red. He tried to scream but there were no voices coming up from his throat. As he fell on his knees, Gamzee went back to normal again and held him in his arms, crying for help to save him. According to Gamzee, when Karkat blacked out he was taken to his quest bed so he could come back to life again. Fortunately being murdered didn't count as a just death or heroic death. Since then every time Gamzee was behind him, Karkat's mind replayed that scene over and over again, causing him to lose his calmness and become horrified.
Now he quickly closed his eyes, waiting for Gamzee to crack down on him. Moments passed by, and when he finally opened his eyes, he found his friend staring at him worriedly. Gamzee reached out for Karkat to comfortingly caress his head, but Karkat flinched away raising his arms defensively around himself.
That certain scene came to his mind when Nepeta tried to stop Gamzee from killing by attempting to murder him with her long and sharp claws. Nepeta raised her claws in Gamzee's direction the same way as Karkat did now with his hands. He remembered watching Gamzee kill Equius with his own bow and arrow. He simply shot the arrow in his legs, making him unable to move. Equius cried out loud from the pain and Gamzee just laughed at him hysterically. When Equius couldn't move, Gamzee stepped in front of him and twisted the string around his neck. The string cut deep in his flesh and put an end to his heavy gasps for air, but he wasn't died yet. Gamzee held tightly the string as Equius coughed up more and more blood. Then Gamzee pulled out the arrow from his legs and brought it up to his face. Surely Equius couldn't see what was going to happen to him and with his last breath he hissed Nepeta's name right before Gamzee tucked the arrow down his throat. Dark blue blood was flowing everywhere as the sharp object cut his neck open. Nepeta was knocked out but when he heard Equius' painful cry she loosely opened her eyes. The first thing she saw was Gamzee sitting still on the ground as he decapitated the head of the lifeless body. Mournful tears ran down her face and she rushed towards Gamzee as fast as she could. She couldn't do anything more though 'cause Gamzee quickly grabbed her wrist and dragged her claws through his face, causing purple blood to trickle down from below his eyes and from his mouth. Then he simply broke her arm in half with a clearly audible crash which sent shivers down Karkat's spine. Nepeta screamed as she collapsed on to the ground. While she wasn't looking, Gamzee took out the broken arrow from the dead Equius' throat and suddenly put an end to Nepeta's suffering by jabbing the object straight into her heart. She became silent in an instant; she didn't even have the time to close her eyes. Gamzee sit down next to her body and broke off her arms and legs along with her head. Karkat covered his ears, not wanting to hear the sound of his beloved friends' crashing bones. When the sounds stopped, he stood next to Gamzee who buried his face between his blood covered palms, crying silently. His purple blood was mixed with dark blue and olive green. For a moment even Karkat thought that this mess of colors was beautiful in its own disgusting way; but then he shook his head, trying to dispel the thought.
Now he shook his head again, but this time he was trying to chase away the terrible memory from his mind. He succeeded, yet he still was a bit upset. He was dragged back to reality as he felt Gamzee put a gently kiss on his forehead.
Karkat blinked.
Something was wrong.
Gamzee seemed way too calm, counter to his usual insane behavior.
He looked at Karkat puzzled; he obviously didn't understand what could have possibly happened to his best friend who always calmed him down. Now he was the distracted one who needed some help to become relieved. Gamzee pulled him in a tight a hug; Karkat thought it was another attempt to kill him when he was defenseless so he tried to escape, but Gamzee didn't let him.
"It's okay, best friend" he smiled.
Karkat heard the smile in his voice and he was unsure of what to think about that. Could that be Gamzee's insane grin that he always shows to his victims before killing them? No, it sounded like something different. Karkat looked up to see Gamzee's face and he was surprised and relieved at the same time as he saw Gamzee's smile and he guessed that it was probably just a temporary condition which wouldn't last long before he went insane again. He shivered as Gamzee held him in his arms.
"Are the nightmares really over now?" Karkat asked finally with a calm voice as he made himself comfortable in Gamzee's tight hug. He was constantly looking into his moirail's eyes.
"Yeah, they're motherfuckin' over." Gamzee grinned as he raised his hands in front of Karkat's face. He thought that Gamzee wanted to caress him again so he didn't move this time. But now he should have moved before it was too late. With his long yellow nails, Gamzee simply scraped out Karkat's eyes with a single quick movement. Karkat cried out when everything went black as he lost his sight; the physical pain was also insufferable. His screams were like a melody to Gamzee's ears at first but a moment later they made him upset. Because the sudden burst of anger he dropped Karkat's eyeballs somewhere on to the ground, they landed with a loud disgusting splash. Gamzee covered Karkat's mouth with his bloody palm so he couldn't breathe, he was whining obviously to ask Gamzee to let him go; but he cried in vain. Gamzee raised his now bloody red nails and cut them deep into his best friend's chest, opening it up with drawing out a large amount of blood. Karkat still showed some signs of life but then his whimpers were finally silenced when Gamzee pushed his hands deep inside the wound to tear out his moirail's heart. It all happened in a blink of an eye.
The bed sheets became filthy from Karkat's red blood but Gamzee didn't care, he just carefully put the still warm dead body next to himself on the bed. He only held the torn out heart close to himself as he curled up in the sheets stinking from blood.
Now he could be sure that nobody would take away his beloved best friend from him.
He could keep him only for himself forever.
It's been a week since Gamzee didn't go sober and didn't want to kill anyone who stood in his way. One single week may not be a long time for anyone who leads an ordinary life, but it was an incredibly long amount of time for Karkat and it was possibly because of the fear of Gamzee becoming sober again. He was afraid that maybe the next time he won't be able to calm him down. But he wasn't afraid of getting murdered. He knew that if he died he would be a victim of a purpose that serves everyone else's benefits. Except for Gamzee who would probably try to commit suicide again after he went back to his normal self and realized what he did.
Something similar happened once. Gamzee was completely insane and after killing Tavros he wanted to chop off Karkat's head with his own sickle. He even placed a deep cut on his neck. But when he saw Karkat's red blood dripping on his hand, he suddenly became sane again. He broke down crying and Karkat tried to comfort him but he didn't succeed, Gamzee constantly said he didn't deserve to live because of almost killing his only friend, he raised the sickle to his wrist with an intention to cut it. Karkat could hardly stop him. He offered to become moirails and Gamzee agreed. Since then they were sharing Karkat's hive.
However, things just slightly become better. Gamzee had woken up every night and he looked like a psycho; from time to time he tried to choke Karkat in his sleep but luckily he always woke up in time. And even when Gamzee was asleep, he had nightmares and ended up waking with suicidal thoughts. These mentally abnormal cases soon became usual, so that now Karkat was afraid of Gamzee when he looked relatively calm when being either awake or asleep. He knew that insanity could kick in at any given moment and then his life would be at risk. He didn't mind it though, 'cause Gamzee was his best friend after all.
While he was so deep in his thoughts, Karkat occasionally looked at his friend. And by occasionally, he meant every single minute. One moment he was sleeping peacefully but then the next he was laying there with eyes shot open. He seemed like he was just staring into the darkness pointlessly, but his eyes were focused on one certain point. Karkat shivered as he looked at him and Gamzee noticed it.
"What's wrong, best friend?" he asked with a calm tone in his voice and that caused Karkat to look away.
"Nothing at all..." he answered, his voice was trembling. No matter how much he tried to hide his anxiety, he obviously failed. He knew what was going to happen when Gamzee heard the fear in his voice. He knew it made him lose control in a blink of an eye.
He was afraid to face his best friend but he could clearly feel the curious pair of eyes staring at his back; it was a feeling similar to the pain of being stabbed. He knew damn well what it's like to be stabbed, once Gamzee chose that method to try to kill him. Back then he couldn't find Gamzee anywhere and he didn't even notice that he was standing right behind him until he heard a loud "HoNk" sound straight into his ears. While he was trying to gain his balance back because of the sudden fright, he could feel a stabbing pain throughout his whole body. When he looked down on himself, he saw a long blade jutting from his stomach, and the feeling of unbearable pain became even more powerful. Blood was dripping from the tip of the blade and his shirt was also soaked in red. He tried to scream but there were no voices coming up from his throat. As he fell on his knees, Gamzee went back to normal again and held him in his arms, crying for help to save him. According to Gamzee, when Karkat blacked out he was taken to his quest bed so he could come back to life again. Fortunately being murdered didn't count as a just death or heroic death. Since then every time Gamzee was behind him, Karkat's mind replayed that scene over and over again, causing him to lose his calmness and become horrified.
Now he quickly closed his eyes, waiting for Gamzee to crack down on him. Moments passed by, and when he finally opened his eyes, he found his friend staring at him worriedly. Gamzee reached out for Karkat to comfortingly caress his head, but Karkat flinched away raising his arms defensively around himself.
That certain scene came to his mind when Nepeta tried to stop Gamzee from killing by attempting to murder him with her long and sharp claws. Nepeta raised her claws in Gamzee's direction the same way as Karkat did now with his hands. He remembered watching Gamzee kill Equius with his own bow and arrow. He simply shot the arrow in his legs, making him unable to move. Equius cried out loud from the pain and Gamzee just laughed at him hysterically. When Equius couldn't move, Gamzee stepped in front of him and twisted the string around his neck. The string cut deep in his flesh and put an end to his heavy gasps for air, but he wasn't died yet. Gamzee held tightly the string as Equius coughed up more and more blood. Then Gamzee pulled out the arrow from his legs and brought it up to his face. Surely Equius couldn't see what was going to happen to him and with his last breath he hissed Nepeta's name right before Gamzee tucked the arrow down his throat. Dark blue blood was flowing everywhere as the sharp object cut his neck open. Nepeta was knocked out but when he heard Equius' painful cry she loosely opened her eyes. The first thing she saw was Gamzee sitting still on the ground as he decapitated the head of the lifeless body. Mournful tears ran down her face and she rushed towards Gamzee as fast as she could. She couldn't do anything more though 'cause Gamzee quickly grabbed her wrist and dragged her claws through his face, causing purple blood to trickle down from below his eyes and from his mouth. Then he simply broke her arm in half with a clearly audible crash which sent shivers down Karkat's spine. Nepeta screamed as she collapsed on to the ground. While she wasn't looking, Gamzee took out the broken arrow from the dead Equius' throat and suddenly put an end to Nepeta's suffering by jabbing the object straight into her heart. She became silent in an instant; she didn't even have the time to close her eyes. Gamzee sit down next to her body and broke off her arms and legs along with her head. Karkat covered his ears, not wanting to hear the sound of his beloved friends' crashing bones. When the sounds stopped, he stood next to Gamzee who buried his face between his blood covered palms, crying silently. His purple blood was mixed with dark blue and olive green. For a moment even Karkat thought that this mess of colors was beautiful in its own disgusting way; but then he shook his head, trying to dispel the thought.
Now he shook his head again, but this time he was trying to chase away the terrible memory from his mind. He succeeded, yet he still was a bit upset. He was dragged back to reality as he felt Gamzee put a gently kiss on his forehead.
Karkat blinked.
Something was wrong.
Gamzee seemed way too calm, counter to his usual insane behavior.
He looked at Karkat puzzled; he obviously didn't understand what could have possibly happened to his best friend who always calmed him down. Now he was the distracted one who needed some help to become relieved. Gamzee pulled him in a tight a hug; Karkat thought it was another attempt to kill him when he was defenseless so he tried to escape, but Gamzee didn't let him.
"It's okay, best friend" he smiled.
Karkat heard the smile in his voice and he was unsure of what to think about that. Could that be Gamzee's insane grin that he always shows to his victims before killing them? No, it sounded like something different. Karkat looked up to see Gamzee's face and he was surprised and relieved at the same time as he saw Gamzee's smile and he guessed that it was probably just a temporary condition which wouldn't last long before he went insane again. He shivered as Gamzee held him in his arms.
"Are the nightmares really over now?" Karkat asked finally with a calm voice as he made himself comfortable in Gamzee's tight hug. He was constantly looking into his moirail's eyes.
"Yeah, they're motherfuckin' over." Gamzee grinned as he raised his hands in front of Karkat's face. He thought that Gamzee wanted to caress him again so he didn't move this time. But now he should have moved before it was too late. With his long yellow nails, Gamzee simply scraped out Karkat's eyes with a single quick movement. Karkat cried out when everything went black as he lost his sight; the physical pain was also insufferable. His screams were like a melody to Gamzee's ears at first but a moment later they made him upset. Because the sudden burst of anger he dropped Karkat's eyeballs somewhere on to the ground, they landed with a loud disgusting splash. Gamzee covered Karkat's mouth with his bloody palm so he couldn't breathe, he was whining obviously to ask Gamzee to let him go; but he cried in vain. Gamzee raised his now bloody red nails and cut them deep into his best friend's chest, opening it up with drawing out a large amount of blood. Karkat still showed some signs of life but then his whimpers were finally silenced when Gamzee pushed his hands deep inside the wound to tear out his moirail's heart. It all happened in a blink of an eye.
The bed sheets became filthy from Karkat's red blood but Gamzee didn't care, he just carefully put the still warm dead body next to himself on the bed. He only held the torn out heart close to himself as he curled up in the sheets stinking from blood.
Now he could be sure that nobody would take away his beloved best friend from him.
He could keep him only for himself forever.